ये हल्की बारिश के दिलकश फुहारों जैसा है। पढ़ने के दौरान चेहरे पे मुस्कान बनी रही। बहुत ख़ूब।
ये वाक्य मुझे बेहद पसंद आए:
1. उसके ऊपर गाढ़े नीले और सफेद रंग के मिश्रण से जो रंग उत्पन्न होता हो, उसे रंग की एक चादर, कुछ ऊपर तक फैली हुई थी।
2. तुम लोग बस गगन की तस्वीरें ही खींच सकते हो, असल में क्या कभी बादल छू पाते हो? या कभी इस पार की स्वच्छ मुलायम हवा को महसूस कर पाते हो? नहीं ना? और करो भी कैसे? तुम सब ढोंगी हो।
3. मेघों ने फैल-फैल कर एक गहरी नीली, स्लेटी रंग की, चादर बुन दी थी और पूरा आसमान एक समान हो गया था।
I want to add one more thing, your writing shows good level of patience, you don't rush for conclusions, and you play with the themes elegantly. I, for example, lack patience sometimes and run for conclusions. I have seen this patience in the hindi writings of @nairalune @tinytitli too.
I am glad you took that description as strengths. A lot of time, it actually just gets unnecessarily long and slow. But descriptions are what means so much to me at the time of writing. Honestly saying, you may feel like you lack patience but that makes your posts crisp and on point, which is a big strength in many cases, especially while posting online. In books or novels, it feels pleasant to read descriptions, but on short stories, on-point things like yours, go very well with it.
Thank you so much for feedback. It would help a lot.
And yeah, @nairalune and @tinytitli really write so well. You guys are so talented deep.
Loved it, Many times it happens, we miss such weather - either being busy or just scrolling. Thanks to u for verbalising this act , it may make your readers mindful for next meeting with ' प्रियतम '.
'कभी उससे बातें करते-करते मेरा मन गाने सुनने को ललचा जाता है, तो कभी उसकी मनमोहक छवि को अपने यादों के बक्सों में कैद करने को।'
(Happens a lot)
I loved that you chose a description rather than poetry , it has painted a picture that I will be craving for the Mausam just before Baarish.
Your "अभिन्न अंग- फोन " might have captured static beauty of the scene. But this description gave a moving memory - काली काली जुल्फों के फंदों ने उलझा दिया !
( Your dedication to write it is visible in long form of this post , it not annoying at all)
Ahhh, it really really means so much to me, Titli. Thank you so much for writing this. This really melted my heart <333.
I am just not good at writing poems. I trust you guys with the poems. I am an essay or a story person, lol. You all really write so beautifully too, and that inspires people like me too.
Thank you so much for all the kind words and reading it <33 :)))
My God, I am soo happy to see a Hindi post on here, it's like a rare delicacy. I used to love Hindi back in school but uske baad fir mauka hi nahi mila hindi padhne ya padhane ka, mujhe bohot pasand aaya ye, har ek wakya me kuch naya tha, aur bilkul Aisa mehsoos honraha tha ki me sab kuch apne aakhon se dekh rahi hu aur mehsoos kar rahi hu. Bohot Khoob! Aise hi aur hindi me likhte rehna, mera mann prasann hogaya bilkul sach me. 😭🥹💞
Thank you sooo much, Sana for reading this. Sach me, school ke baad toh hindi padhna bilkul band sa hi ho gya tha..lekin mai beech beech me kbhi kbhi hindi novels uthati hun. Maza aata unko padhne me phir, hehehe.
Thank you so so much for reading it and for writing such a sweet thing. I'm really grateful 🫂💖🙂↕️.
I'm so glad you liked it. I'll definitely try writing more and better in future..thank you for all the encouragement 🫂✨✨
Ahh..thank you so much🙈🫠 I wait for such opportunities, hehe. You should definitely read “Aapka Banti” by Mannu bhandari ji and also “Maila aanchal” by Phanishwar nath renu ji. Both are really heart touching.
I cried the whole time while reading aapka bunty for some reason. It was really brilliant.
Thank you again for asking, lol. I get so excited on these opportunities 🙈🫂💖
और यहाँ एक लेखिका ने कैसे आपको बस एक मेघ आने और जाने के प्रसंग में बाँधे रखा, यही है इनकी क़लम की जादूगिरी।.. A great draft and kudos for writing in Hindi..I have failed fabulously whenever I have tried.
हिंदी में ऐसा आत्मीय और सहज लेखन पढ़कर दिल खुश हो गया। आपकी शैली बिलकुल उस बारिश जैसी है, धीरे-धीरे भीगाती हुई, दिल तक उतरती हुई। ये सिर्फ मौसम का वर्णन नहीं है, ये एक आत्मीय संवाद है बादलों से, आसमान से, और अपने ही भीतर के अनकहे भावों से। हर दिशा में जो भाव थे, उन्होंने आसमान को एक जीवंत पात्र बना दिया। वाह।
Wah kya Khoob darshaaya hai aapne apne aakash ko . Aur ye likhe hue note ko dekhkar , mujhe Aakash ke rang ke use Inland letter ki yaad aa gayi Jo Kai baar bachpan mein likha karta tha.
Thank you so much for this. I want to insert so many of hug emojis, but using on laptop right now. Please insert five hearts and ten hug emojis. Pleeeaaseee<33 XD
ये हल्की बारिश के दिलकश फुहारों जैसा है। पढ़ने के दौरान चेहरे पे मुस्कान बनी रही। बहुत ख़ूब।
ये वाक्य मुझे बेहद पसंद आए:
1. उसके ऊपर गाढ़े नीले और सफेद रंग के मिश्रण से जो रंग उत्पन्न होता हो, उसे रंग की एक चादर, कुछ ऊपर तक फैली हुई थी।
2. तुम लोग बस गगन की तस्वीरें ही खींच सकते हो, असल में क्या कभी बादल छू पाते हो? या कभी इस पार की स्वच्छ मुलायम हवा को महसूस कर पाते हो? नहीं ना? और करो भी कैसे? तुम सब ढोंगी हो।
3. मेघों ने फैल-फैल कर एक गहरी नीली, स्लेटी रंग की, चादर बुन दी थी और पूरा आसमान एक समान हो गया था।
Thank you so much for reading it. It really means a lot coming from you :))
Thank you so much, both for reading this and for being the inspiration :))
Thank you!!
I want to add one more thing, your writing shows good level of patience, you don't rush for conclusions, and you play with the themes elegantly. I, for example, lack patience sometimes and run for conclusions. I have seen this patience in the hindi writings of @nairalune @tinytitli too.
I am glad you took that description as strengths. A lot of time, it actually just gets unnecessarily long and slow. But descriptions are what means so much to me at the time of writing. Honestly saying, you may feel like you lack patience but that makes your posts crisp and on point, which is a big strength in many cases, especially while posting online. In books or novels, it feels pleasant to read descriptions, but on short stories, on-point things like yours, go very well with it.
Thank you so much for feedback. It would help a lot.
And yeah, @nairalune and @tinytitli really write so well. You guys are so talented deep.
Even I didn't know I had patience 😅
I don't know about patience, but you are so observant and deep, which is soo amazing :))
Loved it, Many times it happens, we miss such weather - either being busy or just scrolling. Thanks to u for verbalising this act , it may make your readers mindful for next meeting with ' प्रियतम '.
'कभी उससे बातें करते-करते मेरा मन गाने सुनने को ललचा जाता है, तो कभी उसकी मनमोहक छवि को अपने यादों के बक्सों में कैद करने को।'
(Happens a lot)
I loved that you chose a description rather than poetry , it has painted a picture that I will be craving for the Mausam just before Baarish.
Your "अभिन्न अंग- फोन " might have captured static beauty of the scene. But this description gave a moving memory - काली काली जुल्फों के फंदों ने उलझा दिया !
( Your dedication to write it is visible in long form of this post , it not annoying at all)
Ahhh, it really really means so much to me, Titli. Thank you so much for writing this. This really melted my heart <333.
I am just not good at writing poems. I trust you guys with the poems. I am an essay or a story person, lol. You all really write so beautifully too, and that inspires people like me too.
Thank you so much for all the kind words and reading it <33 :)))
Well said. +1
My God, I am soo happy to see a Hindi post on here, it's like a rare delicacy. I used to love Hindi back in school but uske baad fir mauka hi nahi mila hindi padhne ya padhane ka, mujhe bohot pasand aaya ye, har ek wakya me kuch naya tha, aur bilkul Aisa mehsoos honraha tha ki me sab kuch apne aakhon se dekh rahi hu aur mehsoos kar rahi hu. Bohot Khoob! Aise hi aur hindi me likhte rehna, mera mann prasann hogaya bilkul sach me. 😭🥹💞
Hayeeee🙈🙈
Thank you sooo much, Sana for reading this. Sach me, school ke baad toh hindi padhna bilkul band sa hi ho gya tha..lekin mai beech beech me kbhi kbhi hindi novels uthati hun. Maza aata unko padhne me phir, hehehe.
Thank you so so much for reading it and for writing such a sweet thing. I'm really grateful 🫂💖🙂↕️.
I'm so glad you liked it. I'll definitely try writing more and better in future..thank you for all the encouragement 🫂✨✨
Koi hindi novel recommendations??
Ahh..thank you so much🙈🫠 I wait for such opportunities, hehe. You should definitely read “Aapka Banti” by Mannu bhandari ji and also “Maila aanchal” by Phanishwar nath renu ji. Both are really heart touching.
I cried the whole time while reading aapka bunty for some reason. It was really brilliant.
Thank you again for asking, lol. I get so excited on these opportunities 🙈🫂💖
Ahaha I know, and I love to watch people talk about their interests with excitement. I will check them both out fs 💖😊
💖💖🫂
और यहाँ एक लेखिका ने कैसे आपको बस एक मेघ आने और जाने के प्रसंग में बाँधे रखा, यही है इनकी क़लम की जादूगिरी।.. A great draft and kudos for writing in Hindi..I have failed fabulously whenever I have tried.
Omg!! Thank you so much for reading and for writing this beautiful comment. I am really grateful.
And please do write in Hindi and post it on here, I am pretty sure it would be great like your English works. Please do give it a try.
Thank you so much for your kind words, again :)))
हिंदी में ऐसा आत्मीय और सहज लेखन पढ़कर दिल खुश हो गया। आपकी शैली बिलकुल उस बारिश जैसी है, धीरे-धीरे भीगाती हुई, दिल तक उतरती हुई। ये सिर्फ मौसम का वर्णन नहीं है, ये एक आत्मीय संवाद है बादलों से, आसमान से, और अपने ही भीतर के अनकहे भावों से। हर दिशा में जो भाव थे, उन्होंने आसमान को एक जीवंत पात्र बना दिया। वाह।
आपके इस संदेश ने मेरे चेहरे पर एक बड़ी सी मुस्कान उत्पन्न कर दी। बहुत बहुत धन्यवाद इसे पढ़ने और सराहने के लिए।
मुझे नहीं पता था कि इसे इस तरह से भी लोग देख पाएंगे। पोस्ट सफल हो गई, आपके इतनी गहराई से पढ़ने पर।
बहुत बहुत धन्यवाद। 🙏🥹✨✨
Wah kya Khoob darshaaya hai aapne apne aakash ko . Aur ye likhe hue note ko dekhkar , mujhe Aakash ke rang ke use Inland letter ki yaad aa gayi Jo Kai baar bachpan mein likha karta tha.
Bahut bahut dhanyawad kumar ji🙏
Mujhe inland letter ke baare me nhi pata tha, maine abhi abhi search Kiya. Kitna badhiya concept tha vo.
Mujhe bhi letters likhne bahut pasand hain. Letter likhna shyd mera sabse pasandida lekhan karya hai.
Aapka bhaut bahut shukriya ise padhne ke liye :)) ✨🙏
thankyou , your post helped me generate a poetic puzzle in 2 lines .
Really? I would love to see it. Thank you so so much✨
It means a lot.
You have written so Well . ✨❣️
Thank you soo soo much, Naira. I really appreciate it :))) <333
You should write more in Hindi ✨❣️all the best 🎗️✨🤜🏻🤛🏻
Thank you so much for this. I want to insert so many of hug emojis, but using on laptop right now. Please insert five hearts and ten hug emojis. Pleeeaaseee<33 XD
🫶🏻❣️❣️🫶🏻🌺